Bellman jokes are a classic form of Swedish humor centered around a character named Bellman. Originating in the 19th century and inspired by poet Carl Michael Bellman, these jokes have evolved from adult humor about Bellman’s life to more child-friendly anecdotes involving Bellman outsmarting others in humorous ways. Modern versions typically feature Bellman alongside two characters of different nationalities, with Bellman emerging victorious in comical situations. These jokes are known for their playful trickery and often involve light-hearted themes that appeal to schoolchildren.
Here are some Bellman jokes that some people find funny:
Bellman, a Russian, and a German wanted to see who could swim from Europe to America the fastest. First out was the German. He swam 1 kilometer and drowned. Next came the Russian. He swam 1 mile and then drowned. Now it was Bellman’s turn and he swam and swam until he almost reached the coast but he got tired and swam back.
Bellman was pushing a heavy wheelbarrow up a hill. When he was almost at the top the wheelbarrow tipped over and Bellman got so angry that he swore out loud. Just then a priest walked by and said,
– If you use foul language, Bellman, you’ll never get to heaven.
To which Bellman replied,
– I’m not going to heaven, I’m just trying to get up this hill!
A Frenchman, a Finn and Bellman bragged about who had the tallest flagpole. ‘My flagpole is so tall that it reaches up to the clouds’, the Frenchman said. ‘My flagpole is so tall that it reaches higher than the clouds!’, the Finn said. ‘My flagpole is so tall that it pokes God in his butt!’, Bellman said.
A Dane, a Norwegian and Bellman made a wager on who could remain inside a goat pen the longest. First out was the Dane, who came out after just 10 minutes yelling ‘Damn! The goat stinks!’ After him the Norwegian went in, and after half an hour he came out yelling, ‘Damn! The goat stinks!’ Finally Bellman went in. After two hours the goat came rushing out yelling ‘Damn! Bellman stinks!’
A Russian, a German and Bellman wanted to see who could swim the fastest across the Atlantic. First out was the German. He swam one kilometer and drowned. Next came the Russian. He swam 10 kilometers and then he drowned. Now it was Bellman’s turn. He swam and swam until he almost reached the coast of America – then he got tired and swam back.