Cop jokes play with the lighter side of law enforcement and the everyday encounters between police officers and the public. These jokes might touch on the humorous misunderstandings that can happen during traffic stops, the playful banter between officers, or the quirky situations cops find themselves in. For instance, a joke might go about a police officer who tries to ticket a speeding snail, asking, “Why so slow?” Or jest about an officer who moonlights as a comedian because he’s great at “standing up” to people. The humor often stems from wordplay, the contrast between the serious nature of policing and the silliness of certain situations, or the unexpected outcomes of routine duties. Cop jokes aim to bring a smile by showcasing the human, approachable side of those who work to keep our communities safe.
A police officer stopped a driver who had crossed an intersection when the traffic light was red. The driver apologized:
“I just had a relapse of my illness right before this intersection!”
“What illness?” asked the officer.
“Color blindness!”
A policeman stops a drunkard staggering on the sidewalk in the middle of the night:
👮 Policeman: Where are you going at this hour of the night?
👨 Drunkard: To a lecture.
👮 Policeman: Oh? And who gives a lecture at this time?
👨 Drunkard: My wife.
Policemen are on a bus heading to a union trip. Before entering a tunnel, the bus driver realizes that the tunnel is too low, or the bus is too tall.
“Push down the roof by five centimeters!” the commander shouts to the policemen.
“There’s no need,” says the bus driver. “I’ll let some air out of the tires, and it will fit.”
“Idiot! It’s too tall at the top, not at the bottom!” the commander yells. 👮♂️👮♂️
A cop stops a car speeding at two hundred where the limit is forty:
“You, didn’t you see the speed limit sign?”
Driver: “How could I at this speed?” 👮♂️🚸
Q: What did the police officer say to his belly button?
A: “You’re under a vest!”
Cop asks suspect questions:
– What is your DOB ?
– What’s DOB, man ?
– Your birthday.
– Oh, that. September 5th.
– What year ?
– Every year, man!
